Down On Karl Johan Street

 

A Song originally released by Jerry Paycheck and his friend, the Late Great Skandinavian Skald and Poet Alfdan Mossberg. Their charming portrayal of an average Night out in the Norse Capital is neither an exaggeration nor lacking in depth and vivid imagery.

( Marie Simonsen, Dagbladet )

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Set Playback Speed to 1.1 or 1.15

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( 1 )

They're Taking Footage Of The Gang War

They're Selling Fake Id's

Sunbeds Are Filled With Northsea Workers

And A TV Crew Is On The Scene

Here Comes The Gender Equality Yenta

She Seems To Think She's Someone Quite Big

She Got One Hand Chained To The Striptease Dancer

The Other One Buried In Her Slip

And The Riot Police They Loiter 

With Blood Running From Their Teeth

As The Lady And I Look At The World Tonight

Down From Karl Johan Street. .

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(2 )

 

The Blue-eyed Blonde There Looks So Pretty

As She's Lulling Through Her Crooked Smile

She Got Both Hands In Her Back Pockets

Synnøve Svabø Style

 Some Little Shit Is Desperately Try'na Get Laid

"Hey Baby I Know You're Mine"

And Someone Yells: Why don't you just fuck off

We Don't Need Your Stupid Pick Up Lines..

And The Only Ones now Still Around

After The Ambulance Left The Beat

Are The Boys In Blue As They're Making Rounds

Down On Karl Johan Street

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( 3 )

The Full Moon Tries To Go In Hiding

But The Stars They Sparkle So Nice

And Futurist Johan Galtung

Already Fears For His Life

And Except For Cain And Abel

And a strung out Titten Tei

Everyone Is Busy Making Love

Or They Just Sit And Wait For The Rain

And The One Last Good Samaritan

Grabs His Damage Report Sheet

For Another Crazy Circus Tonight

Down On Karl Johan Street

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( 4 )

Synnove Solbakken's Working The Corner

She Scares Me More Than The Rest Of Her Crew

Looking As Old As Mother Theresa

Well, Yesterday She Turned Twenty-two..

She Told Me Death Sounds So Romantic

She's Strapped In Kevlar 'gainst HIV

Her Profession Is Her Religion, She Said

Fuck This Life, I'd Rather Hang From A Tree

And Even If Her Gaze Is Turned

Against The Rainbow That The Fires Meet

She's Taking Her Sweet Time To Stare

Down On Karl Johan Street

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( 5 )

 

Jostein Gaarder, Dressed Up As Egon Olsen

With A Suitcase Full of 'Seventh Sense'

Passed By Here, About An Hour Ago

With Harry Dynamite His Best Friend

He Looks Just Like a 40 Year Old Virgin

With The Cigarette That He Bums

As He's Starting To Sniff the Exhaust Pipes

And Yell The Alphabet On Top Of His Lungs

Hell There Ain't Really That Much Left Of Him

But He's Still Famous For More Than One Feat

Like Playing The Electric Dulcimer

Down On Karl Johan Street

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( 6 )

Along The Avenue They Put Up Torches

They're Getting Ready For The Feast

And Old Andersen From Skumaker Gatan

Even Dressed Up As A Gay Priest

They Fed That Little Shit With A Teaspoon

He Thinks He's God That Little Useless Turd

 They Murdered Him With Self-confidence

And Poisoned Him With Words

And Andersen Counsels the Skinny Girl

'Bout damn Time you get back to your Suite..

And That Little Shit Got A Fine For Just Walking

Down Karl Johan Street

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( 7 )

Doktor Apeberg Has Gathered His World

In A Jockstrap Made From PVC

And All His Sexless Patients

Try To Break Up Some Bricks Of Tea

While His Nurse, And Some Westside Losers 

Hand Out Flour Sacks Filled With Mold

And A Business Card With The Smallprint

"May God Rest His Rotten Soul"

And You Can Hear Them Play The Recorder

As The Neighbors Are Smoking Their Weed

If You Lean Out The Window And Listen

Down On Karl Johan Street

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( 8 )

The Street Workers Showed Up At Midnight

With The Dirty Committee's Twelve     

  

They Pulled Shotguns And Rounded Up Everyone

More Competent Than Themselves

Then They Lead Them To The Factory

With The Heart-Attack-Machine

That's Fastened To Their Shoulders

And Then The Kerosene

Was Poured Down From Oslo Town Hall

By Venture Capitalists Pledged To Greed  

 

To Make Sure Noone Can Escape

Down On Karl Johan Street

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 ( 9 )

May God Bless Draugen Oil Field

The Ferry's Leaving As The Engines Roar

And Everyone's Shouting, Kom Igjen Guttar..

Which Side Are You Fighting For ?

Claes Gill And Arnulf Overland 

Were In A Scrap On The Captain's Bridge

While The Door Guards Handed Out Anemones 

And The Orchestra Played A Jig

And From The Windows Facing Westward

You'd See The Mermaids Rise From The Deep

While Noone's Even Making Sense Anymore

Down On Karl Johan Street

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[  INTERLUDE  ]

[ INTERLUDE ]

[ INTERLUDE ]

[ INTERLUDE ]

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( 10 )

Yeah, I Got Your Letter Yesterday

Before I Broke The Key To My Door

When you asked me for a yard of hanging Rope

Was That Some Kind Of Irony For The Poor?

All The People That You Mentioned

I Know Them All But I Won't Play Their Games

I All Had To Give 'em New Faces

I All Had To Give 'em New Names

Right Now I Have A Hard Time Reading, Stop Wasting..

Your Time With Another Sheet

Cause The Post Office Already Ran Out Of Stamps

Down On Karl Johan Street

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( OUTRO )

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( OUTRO )

( OUTRO )

( OUTRO )

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